I like to think I am a fearless I-AM-WOMAN-HEAR-ME-ROAR kind of female, but there are a few areas where I lack courage. And at 42 I am so done with being lame.
My pretty fall hydrangeas that I cut from the garden yesterday?
They harbored a huge brown spider bigger than my thumb, nestled happily behind one of the leaves.
I spied it in the middle of dinner last night. Mark went to get it with a napkin and the great big arachnid jumped down and scurried across the table, causing this supposedly strong modern woman to jump up and scream like a stereotypical scaredy-cat GIRL.
What is it about spiders, and by the way, mice, that skeeve me out so much?
Fear of a little spider? LAME. Fall 2013 Self Improvement Goal: do not scream or freak out like a stereotypical little girl when I see nasty, long legged, beady-eyed, scurrying insects or rodents.
In addition to having a “THING” about some of God’s small creatures, I also have a fear of the LAWN MOWER. You would think that since I owned and operated lots of heavy machinery in my old frame shop, and adore my compound miter saw, nail gun and tools, I would LIKE the lawn mower.
But no. In fact it has taunted me for quite a while.
I’m not sure if my fear is grounded in the fact that the lawn mower is a powerful and dangerous piece of equipment, or a deep-rooted trepidation that if I learn how to use the lawn mower, mowing the lawn will become MY CHORE. And people, I don’t need any other things to do around here, thank you very much. I’m sure you can sympathize.
In theory I KNOW how to use the lawn mower and use it SAFELY. In the 16 years of our marriage, mowing the lawn has always been Mark’s thing, because he likes to do it. Since Mark’s new job keeps him super busy, in the last year or so, the lawn became our teenage son’s job, but right now between school and football, the lawn would be 10 feet high by the time he has a chance to mow it. So long story short, in an attempt to just get done what needs to get done, twice I have tried to mow the lawn. Both times, it stalled and I couldn’t get it started again, so……I just left it until my husband came home.
I know – I know! – I’m so lame!!!!! My apologies to my gender. Wait until the husband comes home?? Because what, I can’t figure it out myself? ****insert very loud sigh here****
I am a girl raised by single mom who learned to do LOTS of things around the house that she didn’t necessarily WANT to do, because hello, they had to get done, and who else was going to do them? She conquered all sorts of fears and learned how to do things that my dad had always taken care of. No whining, no waiting for someone else to do it, no talk, ever, of not being able to do something because she was a woman – what???? She was the embodiment of the Nike JUST DO IT ads.
And I am her daughter. So. Call it fear, laziness, or sheer exhaustion over being in charge of all the fun and not-so-fun chores and projects around a house, whatever it is, I have been thoroughly disgusted with myself for many months over my lack of lawn mower mastery. Note: no one in my family has ever ASKED me to mow the lawn, or insinuated that I should do it. This is an internal battle.
I WANT my kids to see these kinds of chores are NOT GENDER SPECIFIC (and yet, I just want someone else to do them.) I WANT to master that stupid lawn mower (if only because it taunts me.)
Fear of the lawn mower? LAME.
I read the manual cover to cover like the nerd I am. I figured out how to load it up with gas. How to lift the blade before going in reverse. How to take off the baskets that collect the grass and dump the clippings.
So…..if I can figure out the lawn mower…..I’m thinking this bad boy won’t be all THAT hard to wrangle. Right?
Santa brought this baby sewing machine to Hannah when she was in third grade and taking sewing classes. If my third grader can use it, I should be able to figure it out, right?
Fear of the sewing machine? SO SO SO LAME.
Today is the day to get over my sewingmachineaphobia, starting with this free online course for beginners.